HEAL YOUR INNER CHILD

Jyotsna Ahuja Kapoor
4 min readJan 24, 2021

What is the inner child?

The term “inner child” doesn’t refer to the part of your brain that is reserved for having childish thoughts! Rather, the inner child exists as the childlike aspect within your unconscious mind.

You might see this inner child as a direct representation of yourself in your early years, a patchwork collection of the developmental stages you’ve passed through, or a symbol of youthful dreams and playfulness.

What is inner child healing?

Inner child healing, or inner child work, is an essential part of inner work, the psycho-therapeutic or spiritual process of changing yourself to become the person you know you can be. On its own, inner child healing reconnects us to the wounded elements of our inner child within.

If we do inner-child work by connecting to the little boy or girl within us, we can reconnect with some of the reasons for our adult fears, phobias and life patterns. When we begin to understand them, then magic, healing, and transformation can occur.

Healing your inner child can take time, but these 5 steps are a good starting point.

1. Acknowledge your inner child

To begin healing, you first have to acknowledge your inner child’s presence.

The process of acknowledging your inner child mostly just involves recognizing and accepting things that caused you pain in childhood. Bringing the hurt out into the light of day can help you begin to understand their impact.

That said, many people do find it helpful, even soothing, to address their inner child as they would a living person, so don’t feel afraid to give it a try.

2. Listen to what your inner child has to say

After opening the door to a connection with your inner child, it’s important to listen to the feelings that enter.

When the need for love, recognition, praise, and other types of emotional support go unmet in childhood, the trauma that results can last well into your adult life.

But it’s never too late to heal. By learning to nurture your inner child, you can validate these needs, learn to express emotions in healthy ways, and increase self-compassion and self-love.

3. Journal as your inner child

Many people find journaling a great way to sort through challenging or confusing experiences and emotional turmoil. If you keep a journal, you might already get a lot of benefit from this coping strategy.

Just as journaling can help you recognize patterns in your adult life that you want to change, journaling from the perspective of your inner child can help you recognize unhelpful patterns that began in childhood.

For this journaling exercise, set your present self aside for the moment and channel your child self. Try photos or a brief visualization exercise to help recall how you felt at the specific age you’re intending to explore.

4. Bring back the joys of childhood

Adulthood certainly comes with plenty of responsibilities, but relaxation and playfulness are both essential components of good emotional health.

If your childhood lacked positive experiences, getting back in touch with your playful side and making time for fun can help heal the pain of missing out on what you needed as a child.

It’s also important to enjoy small pleasures, like ice cream after a walk, games with your partner or children, and laughter with friends.

Whatever you do, making regular time for fun and light-heartedness in your life can help rekindle the positive emotions of youth.

5. Leave the door open

Healing doesn’t always have a definite end. It’s often more of an open-ended journey.

You’ve started the process by reaching out to your inner child. Now you can cultivate this newfound awareness and continue listening for your child self’s guidance as you move forward.

Your child self may have more to reveal about challenges from the past. But you can also learn to become more spontaneous and playful and consider what life has to offer with a greater sense of wonder.

Staying in tune with your inner child can lead to a more complete sense of self and boost confidence and motivation. Reinforce the connection you’ve opened by affirming your intent to continue listening, offering love and compassion, and working to heal any wounds that remain open.

When needs for love, recognition, praise, and other types of emotional support go unmet in childhood, the trauma that results can last well into your adult life.

But it’s never too late to heal. By learning to nurture your inner child, you can validate these needs, learn to express emotions in healthy ways, and increase self-compassion and self-love.

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